The 5 Stages of Watching the Olympics

Everyone has a certain pattern to watching the Olympics. It’s like the 5 Stages of Watching the Olympics. You innocently begin to watch whatever sport, known (like snowboarding or figure skating) or unknown (like curling or that wild sport where you ski, shoot, and ski), the network is currently featuring. There’s a good chance you know, if not nothing, then next to nothing about this sport. You think you’re safely uninterested. The truth is, you just don’t know what’s about to happen to you. Before you know it, you find yourself rooting for a whatever country is at the front or the underdog in the back. It’s easy pickings. But…now you’re paying attention.

You’ve officially entered the first Stage of the Olympics: Ensnarement.

You’ve entered the black hole. Join us, the water’s warm. You begin subtly leaning in to their turns or wincing when someone falls. You’ve seen a couple people doing their rounds, and you’re getting a feel for the sport. You still don’t fully understand the rules, but you’re getting there.

This half in, half out mentality is the second Stage of the Olympics: Investment.

You start giving advice to the athletes. They obviously need it, and you know better. You’re taking that turn too fast! You don’t want to miss that shot, you’ll have to do a penalty loop! You might find your anxiety level increasing. You’re now fully invested. You know you need to move your laundry to the dryer…but something might happen when you leave the room! The US hockey team needs you!

Welcome to the third Stage: Imitation.

You always knew you were meant to be a sports announcer. Is it too soon to throw in your hat for the next Olympics? The event is almost over, and your athlete—handpicked by you in the depths of all your knowledge for this sport—starts making mistakes because the pressure is getting to them. Your adrenaline is kicking in, and you might be experiencing irrational urges to throw things or yell at the TV. They need to pull it together. WE COULD WIN THIS! The athletes don’t need those men running alongside in jumpsuits. You’re right here.

This is the fourth Stage: Anxiety.

You’re late for work. You just thought, “If McMorris thinks he’s getting on the podium with anything less than a clean 1620 toe grab, he’s a fool.” You recorded every round of Big Air. And the guy you were pulling for finally started listening to your advice and playing the game. He’s waited three Olympics to get to this medal moment. And it’s here. You might cry a little.

The fifth Stage of the Olympics has arrived: Achievement.

You’re never going back to the way you were, until of course the moment the Olympics ends. Then you’re back to a vague understanding of the difference between bobsled and luge. In the meantime, you can continue to care via books. We have quite the selection for you:

Gymnastics: Gabrielle Douglas and Simone Biles

Figure Skating: Scott Hamilton

Diving: David Boudia

Track and Field: Sanya Richards-Ross, Lopez Lomong, and Bryan Clay

See you in two years! Kayleigh is an active friend to the Page Chaser team and enjoys practicing her English accent and drinking tea – an Anglophile to the end. If you want to follow Kayleigh, check her out on the Page Chaser Instagram, Facebook, or at the movies using her Movie Pass. HarperCollins Christian Publishing, Inc., operates Page Chaser, the publisher of Grace, Gold and Glory, Courage to Soar, Finish First, Greater than Gold, Chasing Grace, Running for My Life, and Redemption.